Choosing the Light
WE KNOW JOY WHEN WE FEEL IT. IT’S THE SENSATION THAT OVERWHELMS US WITH LOVE WHEN WE GAZE AT OUR PEACEFULLY SLEEPING CHILDREN; WHEN TEARS WELL UP AT THE SOUND OF OUR FAVORITE SONGS; WHEN WE GASP AT THE BEAUTY OF DANCING LEAVES DAPPLED WITH SUNLIGHT.
But those moments are as fleeting as a flickering fire. They warm us for a while, only to fade.
A scan through the offerings of any bookstore immediately reveals various paths to joy. There is, of course, The Joy of Cooking, a classic beginner’s tool for any budding chef. But there is also a seemingly bottomless well of other works that begin with “Joy of…” There’s the Joy of True Meditation; Joy of Watercolor; Joy of Less (about decluttering); Joy of Mixology (bartending); Joy of Home Distilling (making ingredients for the former); Joy of X (math); Joy of Genius; Joy of Sex. And that’s just a sampling.
Much of humanity, it seems, as evidenced by this surplus of reading material on the subject, is searching for joy. Yet the feeling often proves elusive. Perhaps by seeking it so fervently, we sometimes fail to recognize it. Perhaps because we fail to look into ourselves.
“Everyone seeks happiness, joyfulness, but from outside,” His Holiness the Dalai Lama said in The Book of Joy, a dialogue with South African Archbishop Desmond Tutu. “From money, from power, from big car, from big house. Most people never pay much attention to the ultimate source of happy life, which is inside.”
Since the way we worship is an extension and expression of how we live, it only stands to reason that if we want to worship God with joy, we must, therefore, live joyfully.
The Dalai Lama tells us how to access a kind of joy that is more profound and constant, by reaching beyond the external senses: “We can... experience happiness in the deeper level through our mind, such as through love, compassion, and generosity. What characterizes happiness at this deep level is the sense of fulfillment that you experience.”
In the joint interview captured in The Book of Joy, the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu engage in an inspiring conversation about their personal journeys as spiritual leaders of nations in the midst of immense sociopolitical change, turmoil, and pain.
Yet, despite the hardship they’ve both endured during exile from Tibet and under apartheid in South Africa, respectively, both have maintained famously positive outlooks on humanity.
In The Book of Joy, these two sages describe eight pillars of joy:
PERSPECTIVE: “For every event in life, there are many different angles. When you look at the same event from a wider perspective, your sense of worry and anxiety reduces, and you have greater joy.” — the Dalai Lama
HUMILITY: “Humility is the recognition that your gifts are from God. It does not mean you have to deny your own gifts or shrink from using them. God uses each of us in our own way, and even if you are not the best, you may be the one who is needed or the one who is there.” — Archbishop Tutu
HUMOR: “People who are always laughing have a sense of abandon and ease. They are less likely to have a heart attack than those people who are really serious and who have difficulty connecting with other people.” — the Dalai Lama
ACCEPTANCE: “We are meant to live in joy. This does not mean that life will be easy or painless. It means that we can turn our faces to the wind and accept that this is the storm we must pass through. We cannot succeed by denying what exists.” — Archbishop Tutu
FORGIVENESS: “Sometimes people misunderstand and think forgiveness means you accept or approve of wrongdoing. No, this is not the case. We must make an important distinction. The actor and action, or the person and what he has done. Where the wrong action is concerned, it may be necessary to take appropriate counteraction to stop it. Toward the actor or the person, however, you can choose not to develop anger and hatred. This is where the power of forgiveness lies—not losing sight of the humanity of the person while responding to the wrong with clarity and firmness.” — the Dalai Lama
GRATITUDE: “Where some people see a halfempty cup, you can see it as half-full.” — Archbishop Tutu
COMPASSION: “If you want a happy life and fewer problems, you have to develop a serious concern for others. And if there is a possibility to help, then you can help. If there is no possibility to help, you can just pray or wish them well.” — the Dalai Lama
GENEROSITY: “I’ve sometimes joked and said God doesn’t know very much math, because when you give to others, it should be that you are subtracting from yourself. But in this incredible kind of way—I’ve certainly found that to be the case so many times—you give and then it seems like in fact you are making space for more to be given to you.” — Archbishop Tutu
In his book The Return of the Prodigal Son, Roman Catholic priest, professor, and theologian Henri Nouwen describes joy as a discipline:
“It requires choosing for the light, even when there is much darkness to frighten me,” he writes. “Once you choose to claim the joy hidden in the midst of all suffering, life becomes celebration. Joy never denies the sadness but transforms it into a fertile soil for more joy.”
To worship joyfully, even in the hardest times, is to lose ourselves in the sacred and profound, remembering that we are not alone.
“Worship is the submission of all our nature to God,” wrote William Temple, who served as archbishop of Canterbury in England during World War II. “It is the quickening of conscience by His holiness; the nourishment of mind with His truth; the purifying of the imagination by His beauty; the opening of the heart by His love; the surrender of will to His purpose—and all of this gathered up in adoration, the most selfless emotion of which our nature is capable.”
